Top Challenges Families Face in ESDM and How to Overcome Them
- Erin Byrnes
- Mar 23
- 3 min read
The Early Start Denver Model (ESDM) is a play-based, relationship-focused intervention designed to support young autistic children in developing communication, social and cognitive skills. While research shows ESDM can be highly effective, families often face challenges when implementing it at home. If you’re feeling overwhelmed, you’re not alone! Here are some of the most common obstacles and practical solutions to help you and your child succeed.

1. Understanding the ESDM Approach
Sometimes parents find ESDM complex and overwhelming at first, especially if they’re new to early intervention. Unlike traditional structured therapy, ESDM is embedded in play and daily activities, which can make it feel less structured.
How to Overcome It:
Take it step by step. Focus on learning one technique at a time rather than trying to master everything at once.
Ask your therapist questions. A trained ESDM provider can break things down in a way that makes sense for your family.
Use parent-friendly resources. Books, online videos and workshops can help you understand the approach in a clear and practical way.
Book into parent coaching. Kindred Kids offers a 12-week parent coaching coarse called Project ImPACT that supports your child's ESDM Intervention by teaching you strategies to use in everyday routines.
2. Keeping Sessions Engaging and Playful
Since ESDM is based on natural play interactions, parents sometimes struggle to keep their child engaged. It can be difficult if your child prefers repetitive play, avoids interaction or loses interest quickly.
How to Overcome It:
Follow your child’s lead. Start with activities they already enjoy and slowly introduce new elements to expand their play.
Use high-interest motivators. Whether it’s a favorite toy, snack, or movement activity, incorporating motivators can boost engagement.
Keep sessions short. Frequent, short interactions (2-5 minutes at a time) can be more effective than long, structured play sessions.
3. Managing Behaviours of Concern
ESDM encourages parents to use praise and natural rewards but some families struggle when their child engages in meltdowns, avoidance or repetitive behaviors of concern that interfere with learning.
How to Overcome It:
Identify triggers. Observe when challenging behaviors happen and look for patterns (e.g., sensory sensitivities, frustration, transitions).
Use clear and consistent communication. Simple language, visual cues and predictable routines help children understand expectations.
Reward positive behaviors. Instead of focusing on what your child shouldn’t do, praise and reward small steps in the right direction.
Book in for a 5-session course on Behaviours of Concern. Kindred Kids has a 5-session course on understanding and changing behaviours of concern. Many parents note reduced parental stress after completing the course.

4. Staying Consistent with ESDM at Home
Consistency is key in ESDM, but parents often feel stretched thin managing work, household responsibilities, and daily routines.
How to Overcome It:
Embed ESDM into daily life. Instead of setting aside a separate therapy time, use techniques during meals, bath time and play.
Involve the whole family. Siblings and caregivers can use simple ESDM strategies in everyday interactions.
Set realistic expectations. Progress takes time—celebrate small wins along the way!
5. Feeling Overwhelmed or Burnt Out
Caring for a neurodivergent child is rewarding but can also be exhausting. Many parents feel pressure to “do everything right” or worry that they aren’t making enough progress.
How to Overcome It:
Give yourself grace. No one is perfect, AND small efforts each day add up over time.
Seek support. Join parent groups in person or online, connect with other families or talk to an ESDM therapist for guidance.
Prioritise self-care. Taking breaks, asking for help and managing stress will help you support your child more effectively.
Implementing ESDM at home comes with challenges, but with patience, creativity and the right support, it can be a powerful tool in your child’s development. Remember, you don’t have to do it alone! Small, meaningful interactions each day can make a big impact over time.
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